Stress Reliever

Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Darling : When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Darling : Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem Can there be greater than this one?

NEVER BE OVER-CONFIDENT

It was the end of the school year, and a kindergarten..
teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils.

The florist's son handed her a gift. She shook it,
held it overhead, and said, "I bet I know what it is. Flowers." "That's right!"
the boy said, "But, how did you know?"
"Oh, just a wild guess," she said.

The next pupil was the sweet shop owner's daughter.
The teacher held her gift overhead, shook it,
and said, "I bet I can guess what it is. A box of sweets."
"That's right, but how did you know?" asked the girl.
"Oh, just a wild guess," said the teacher.

The next gift was from the son of the liquor storeowner.
The teacher held the package overhead, but it was leaking.
She touched a drop off the leakage with her finger and put
it to her tongue. "Is it wine?" she asked.
"No," the boy replied, with some excitement.
The teacher repeated the process, tasting a larger drop of
the leakage. "Is it champagne?" she asked.
"No," the boy replied, with more excitement.
The teacher took one more big taste before declaring,
"I give up, what is it?" With great glee,
the boy replied, "It's a puppy!"

Bird Flu Yesterday / Today

Take care from bird flu

Funny words

If marriages are made in heaven , then what are made in Hell?
Ans : the days after marriage

I wrote ur name on the sands............. it got washed away,
I wrote ur name in air..........................it got blown away,
So i wrote ur name in my heart.............
i got a HEART ATTACK

when i call u;
1 ring means i'm thinking of u;
2 ring means i like u;
3 means i miss u;
4 means ........pick d phone idiot


History Teacher : From where to where did the mughals rule ?
Student : sir, i am not sure but think from page 15 to 26 sir....

SMILE
- is a language of loveSMILE
- is a source to win hearts...
SMILE - creates greatness in ur personality
SO....Brush ur Teeth today onwards

CALL CENTRE

Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer: "Ok."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
Customer: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."

Friendship

There is this classic joke on the difference of friendship between men and women.

Friendship between women:
A woman didn't come home one night. The next day she told her husband that she had slept over at a girlfriend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends.None of them knew anything about it.

Friendship between men:
A man didn't come home one night. The next day he told his wife that he had slept over at a buddy's house. The woman called her husband's 10 best friends.

Eight of them confirmed that he had slept over, and two claimed that he was still there.

Wanna Chat with God?

If you want to chat with God,Go Here
http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html
& Try.

Can you do it?

Try to say often,

watches. Which witch watch which Swatchwatch?

Advanced:
Three switched witches watch three Swatch watch switches. Whichswitched witch watch which Swatch watch switch.

Hat-Seller

There was once a hat-seller who passed by a forest on his way back from the market. The weather was very hot and so he decided to take a nap under one of the trees, so he left his whole basket of hats by the side.A few hours later, he woke up by some sounds. The next thing he realized was that all his hats was gone. He heard some monkeys on the tree and so he looked up. To his surprise, the tree was full of monkeys and they had taken all his hats.The hat-seller sits down and think of how he can get the hats down. He think and think and start scratching his head. The next moment, he realized that the monkeys were doing the same action.Next, he took down his own hat and saw the monkeys do exactly the same. An idea came to him, he took his hat and throw it on the floor and the monkeys do that too.So he finally managed to get all his hats back. If you think you have read this before....., read on!!!Fifty years later, his grandson, Jack, also became a hat-seller and had heard this monkey story from his grandfather.

One day, just like his grandfather, he passed by the same forest, it was very hot, and he took a nap under the same tree and left the hats on the floor. He woke up and realized that all his hats were gone. He looked up and realized that the monkeys had taken all the hats. He remembered his grand father's words, started scratching his head and the monkeys follows.He took down his hat and fanned himself and again the monkeys followed. Now, very convinced of his grandfather's idea, JACK threw his hat on the floor but to his surprise, the monkeys still hold on to all the hats.Then one monkey climbed down the tree, grabbed the hat on the floor, gave him a slap and said "You think only you have a grandfather".

ASK B4 U SLAP

A woman wanted to reach her husband on his mobile phone but discovered that she was out of credit. she instructed her son - to use his own phone to pass across an urgent message to daddy who is at site. After junior had called, he got back to mummy to inform her that it was a lady that picked up daddy's phone the three times he tried reaching dad on the mobile. (Women!!)She waited impatiently for her husband to return from site, immediately she sighted him, she gave him a very hot slap, while the man was trying to ask why? She repeated the slap, people from neighborhood rushed around to know the cause of this.The man asked junior to tell everybody what the lady said to him when he called, junior said "the number u are Trying To call Is not Reachable At The Moment. Pls Try Again Later".